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Overcooked Steak

2021-0712 Monday. 1149 PM. We hadn't taken a family vacation in a few years. There was the pandemic, which, I think, quite literally halted all vacations for about a year. Even before that, though, with my eldest in and out of residential behavioral treatment, we hadn't been able to go all together anywhere, away from Portland.

Years ago, before children, the bride and I had decided to borrow an exorbitant amount of money in order to own a timeshare. Through the years, we not only enjoyed a number of resorts around the country, but also managed to pay off the debt. As savvy and satisfied timeshare owners, I feel we're not only in a minority, but also very committed to resorting away from home once a year. As quickly as we adopted our two oldest, they adopted the idea of family vacation. The four of us spent more than a few sleepless nights, living our best lives, at the whim of spontaneous delight.

As they say, though, the honeymoon doesn't last forever. While the resolve of the bride and me never waned, puberty and past trauma brought on a different animal in our pack. After the favorite dog died and a new sister entered the picture, things haven't been much in focus since. I don't know what it's like to have my parents give up their rights to me, become a ward of the state, get adopted twice and sent back both times, but my two eldest children do. I don't begrudge their doubt of my love. I understand why they still question the bride's commitment. I accept their attempts to sabotage our relationship. But, today, we did our first full day in Las Vegas, Nevada together, on vacation in July 2021. Sure, it's a heavy 110° outdoors, the 13 year old is constantly upsetting the 4 year old, who is just as constantly screaming or crying, the 16 year old is moody or tired or overwhelmed and my bride is the only planner in the family. It wasn't easy today. I doled out more penalties than I ever would want to on a family trip. The bride and I fought on a few occasions. I think I made each of my kids cry at some point. Evidently, we're out of practice, but, today, we practiced.

I've remarked before that I don't endorse that "practice makes perfect" as some are given to say. I do believe practice makes better, and we'll be on this vacation till Friday. In his teaching to the gathering of Christians in Ephesus, Paul includes this: And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. That's what I need to practice. That, and grilling. I was distracted by today's Home Run Derby while preparing the meat for dinner, and overcooked the steaks much to the dismay of my already provoked family. I think, sometimes, that big name guys in baseball refrain from competing in the Home Run Derby because it's too much of a risk. If they don't perform well, which is a terrific likelihood, their brand and reputation could suffer. So, I respect the guys who put it on the line and compete, even if Pete Alonso opens with 35 dingers in the first round, embarrassing the field. I certainly don't want to parent like that- refraining from things because of fear. I am competing on the stage of life against an unseen enemy for the present tense of my children. That will require that I take risks and potentially damage my reputation. This Baker Family Vegas Vacation may be the straw that breaks the back of the metaphorical camel, but I'm all in! This is bakesHere. 2021-0712 Monday. 1149 PM. ACQUIRE as NEEDED. bakesHere.com

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